What happens to all my baked goods?
Well they get eaten of course! But not all by me. There was a time when I would console my stress, anger, and loneliness with a dozen cookies and a pint of ice cream. Yes, all in one sitting. I’m proud to say though, this is no longer the case.
Lucky for me, I have a family (and also a boyfriend!) who loves sweets as much as I love baking them!
This is the whole crew! My brother Justin no longer lives with us though because he is a big kid with a degree, a real job, and an apartment these days. This picture was taken last summer at pretty much the height of my anorexia, and my hair was also dyed red. I put on a smile for this picture, but I was anything but happy. I tried to find a more recent picture of the whole family, but this was the best I could find on my computer. Time to get the family together again soon for a group shot!
So now these days, post-anorexia, post-binge eating disorder, post-bulimia, I am happy to say that I certainly enjoy the treats I make, but I eat them when my body truly wants something sweet. In fact, lately I haven’t been craving sweets as much as usual. I usually want something sweet after lunch. Instead of eating my normal scoop of ice cream, I’ve been craving chocolate-y protein bars. Not only do they taste like a candy bar, but I have so much energy after eating them and they keep me much more satiated than a scoop of ice cream or a cookie. I’m seriously turning into a protein bar addict, and it is not good for my bank account (okay, my parents’ bank account). Those things are expensive! But you and your body are worth the splurge!
I will be writing an entire post about my full eating disorder journey and how I stopped binge eating later this week. I hope this is a topic of interest to some of my readers.
Now…onto homemade Oreos!
Yep, not only do they look better than store-bought, but they taste better too. After eating one my dad exclaimed, “These are delightful!” And after his fourth cookie he stated, “These are NOT going to last very long.” Putting a smile on someone’s face is one thing I love about baking.
I’m not going to lie. These cookies are truly a treat. There is really nothing healthy about them aside from the fact that they are less processed than store bought. Beside that, its full on sugar, butter, and shortening. I feel like I’m channeling my inner Paula Deen. And it feels soooo good.
adapted from Smitten Kitchen
Makes 25 to 30 sandwich cookies
For the chocolate wafers:
1 1/4 cups all-purpose flour
1/2 cup unsweetened Dutch process cocoa (I used regular unsweetened cocoa, and they turned out delicious. By all means use Dutch process if you have it on hand as it will result in a richer flavor.)
1 teaspoon baking soda
1/4 teaspoon baking powder
1/4 teaspoon salt
1 cup sugar
1/2 cup plus 2 tablespoons (1 1/4 sticks) room-temperature, unsalted butter
1 large egg
For the filling:
1/4 cup (1/2 stick) room-temperature, unsalted butter
1/4 cup vegetable shortening
2 cups sifted confectioners’ sugar
2 teaspoons vanilla extract
- Set two racks in the middle of the oven. Preheat to 375°F.
- In a food processor, or bowl of an electric mixer, thoroughly mix the flour, cocoa, baking soda and powder, salt, and sugar. While pulsing, or on low speed, add the butter, and then the egg. Continue processing or mixing until dough comes together in a mass.
- Take rounded teaspoons of batter and place on a parchment paper-lined baking sheet approximately two inches apart. With moistened hands, slightly flatten the dough. Bake for 9 minutes, rotating once for even baking. Set baking sheets on a rack to cool.
- To make the cream, place butter and shortening in a mixing bowl, and at low speed, gradually beat in the sugar and vanilla. Turn the mixer on high and beat for 2 to 3 minutes until filling is light and fluffy.
- To assemble the cookies, in a pastry bag with a 1/2 inch, round tip, pipe teaspoon-size blobs of cream into the center of one cookie. Place another cookie, equal in size to the first, on top of the cream. Lightly press, to work the filling evenly to the outsides of the cookie. Continue this process until all the cookies have been sandwiched with cream.